I never realized the negativity social media brought upon my being, especially Twitter. I don’t want to say that I was addicted to it, but it sure did feel that way. I spent way too much time on Twitter that I was beginning to feel this unwanted weight on my shoulders, but I couldn’t quite pin point the cause. It wasn’t until last week when I finally began to open my eyes and see where the problem was coming from.
I started noticing my attitude was becoming worse with time. I was becoming less happier and more miserable. I’ve always been insecure, but I was allowing my insecurities to surface more often that normal. I was starting to hate myself rather than learning to love myself. I was at a place where I was questioning who I am and what my purpose is on this Earth. I felt like if I were to leave that it would have no effect on anyone. Depression slithered into my life, whispering in my ear that I was no good for anyone. It kept telling me that I was an unloveable person and no one was ever going to like me. There were times were I didn’t even want to get out of bed. I was afraid because this was how I was going to live my life forever.
I feel like a person could tweet signs of depression or the urge of wanting to commit suicide and no one would pay any mind to it. It isn’t until that person ends their life and all the suicide prevention tweets go up. However, I do understand that this is not always the case.
Twitter has so much going on, that I was beginning to wish I had what other people had which ranged from materialistic items, physical qualities, confidence, to personality types. It was taking such a toll on my well-being that I was being selfish rather than being grateful for all that I am and have.
Now that I’m off, I feel a THOUSAND times better and lighter. I have absolutely no intentions on going back to the place that caused so much negativity in my life. I feel a little like myself again, but learning to love myself is going to take some time but I’m willing to put forth the effort. I’m glad that I was able to locate the problem before things got worse.
Social media is great to catch up with friends and see amazing life changing things for them, however it’s not for everyone and that’s okay. It’s not being selfish to take care of yourself and make sure what is best for you.